sigh.
im really too gei kiang already. do "journey" for pw.
then go choose to do journey of dying.
wad a shitty emo topic to do!

went to borrow books about the topic to work on my PI for the final submission.
and i can tell you the things written in the books are really kanasai. damn sad lah!

don't believe u read this.(from "The Rights of the Dying" a companion for life's final moments)


A message for the dying:

As you read this you may be beginning your last months, days, or hours here on earth. you have travelled on a long and winding road on this journey that we call life. many philosophies teach that what you feel and experience in the last moments of this life are the seeds of your next one, of your new life.

None of us know what will happen from here, but if you look deep inside, deep in your soul, you will know that birth is not a beginning and death will not be an ending.
if you think back, you'll remember that you never felt as if you didn't exist before you were born into this life. rather, you felt as if you have always existed and always will.
that's why this death will not be an ending. you may not have life as you know it once you die, but you will continue. you will take all of your love and all of your memories with you on your journey. what you have experienced will not be lost, neither will your life be lost. whatever you may feel about your life, whatever has happened, has happened. and that was your life. try to accept that it was your life, just as it was. no better and no worse.

As this life draws to a close, it is time to let go of your anger, as well as your love. you have worked; you have worried; you have driven hard; you have loved and laughed; you have been angry and disappointed. it is now time to rest, time to relax. there is nothing else for you to do. there is no other way for you to be. if you find yourself becoming frightened, rest and relax into your breath. your breath will take where you need to go. know that those around you who may cry and scream are doing so because they do not know how to say good-bye; they are doing the best they can. and know, in your heart, that you will leave part of yourself behind with everything you have done, with everyone you have ever met, with every life that you have touched. you will also take a part of us with you.

If you still feel attached to the right and wrong of your life, know that right and wrong are now over. you experienced life exactly as you were supposed to. you were born whole and innocent, beautiful and worthy, and you will die that way. you have spent time and followed time; now time will be no more. you will go to a place where we already are. you were carried off in the miracle of death. all that we are, all that we have felt for you, all the love that was given to you, will be your cushion on this journey. now you will begin. i wish you love, peace, and a safe passage. it is now time for you to return home.


A message for the living:

I understand how hard it is for you to watch someone you love slipping away. the pain is excruciating, the feeling of decastation unmatched by anything you have ever known. losing a loved one is one of the hardest experiences any of us will have to face, but there are some things that you can do to make it easier on yourself and those around you:

Allow yourself to grieve. you can't ignore it or run away from it: eventually it will catch up with you. grief is a neccessary part of the healing process. it will subside, but you must go through the various stages.

Don't feel guilty because you are continuing to live. you are not responsible for what has happened. accept that some things are out of your hands.

Let the dying know that it's okay to leave-that you'll be all right without them. you'll miss them for the rest of your life, but you would not want them to stay if it continues their suffering.

Dont' feel guilty if you find yourself preparing for your loved one's death. this is a natural occurence-it's not an insult, and it won't hasten the death. but it does help prepare you for the inevitable and is nature's defense against deep pain.

Say what you want to say now, while there's still time. you may still have something to say or something to do for your loved one. "Do it fearlessly," one patient told me. let your loved one die with an open heart-yours.

To the best of your ability, try to accept what is happening and the way it is happening. as difficult as it may be to understand and accept, dying is a part of life.

Take care of yourself and let others support you. seek help from a therapist, a support group, your religion, or whatever elso comforts and strengthend you. try to stick to some kind of regular routine, especially during this very stressful and upsetting period. believe it or not, it will help normalize your life and make you feel better.

Above all, be gentle with yourself, it really will get better with time, although you may not believe it right now. time heals all wounds, and although your loved one will no longer be physically present, you will always retain the love you have shared with that person. those whom we've loved and who have loved us in return will always live on in our hearts and our minds.

I wish you peace in healing.


see? see? emo-momo right? (provided you really finished reading everything)
sigh.

anyway, chatted with xuanhan just now. haha. really quite missed him sia. those times in co and in 4e5. the laughter, the sweat, the hardwork we shared.
and he missed swiss lots too! ;)

alright. it's getting late early aldy.
im off for my beauty sleep now! Zzzz