so much things have happened these few days and weeks. as though i was on an emotional roller coaster. been busy. really busy with alot of stuffs.
1) and so i celebrated my birthday with jiji.
pictures can't really explain how much fun we are having but still i think i gotta pen down such fantastic moments.

this is the card done by none other than the organiser, tanyizhuang! isn't it cute? though it wasn't a real surprise since she and hy disappeared for a long time while we were singing in the k room, i still love the card. but the thing is i dunno where to place it afterall. so its now still lying somewhere my room.

and yeah.so yz thinks she wanna capture this moment, when she actually did a real decent and nice card; so the picture.





i thought these are really some very nice pictures jiji have taken ever since we came together as a clique.i don't know why. i really loved these pictures!
anyway,i was forced to wear that tweety bird pyjamas since they say i must look dumb on my birthday. but i thought it goes well my shirt too,right?


and yeah, these are the pictures taken when we send baba home. she was the only one who didn't stayed over.

and yes, i wore this all along.
i guess its only with these friends when i can really let down my hair and fool around so much.
anw, received an awesome gift from jiji! they chipped $88.80 to my ipod touch! and all thanks to jie, whom got it for me at a cheaper price from her friend's friend's friend whos working in epicentre.

and yeap. that's not all for my 19th birthday. though i mentioned previously that i didn't received much presents, but after listing them down, actually it wasn't very little also huh.

this was from jieying. a card and also a surprise from her early in the morning on jan29 itself.

this was from my student! surprising enough, he remembered. anw, did i mention that i was that suay to have taught my previous tuition teacher's son?yeah,so i did. he recognise me the first lesson i went in. anw, found him to be really lovely and sweet to have given me this small little note.

then it was this card and chocolate from junyang. the choco are great. and indeed, it serves as an energy booster!
birthday card from yiting every year without fail.

this angel strap from sis. handmade by her friend.

bracelet from jiamin, xuanhan, benghow,edward, jeanette, cia.
and actually lunched with bh and jm a few days before my birthday. they wanted to treat me to lunch but i insisted on paying since they alr got me a lovely present. was a great meet up with old friends yet again.we headed to town after lunch as jiamin needs to do something like a survey at 313 somerset.

sweet and card from dawn.
2)
met up with wenxian last friday. he treated me to newyorknewyork and gave me a card and a bottle from starbucks.oh well.am really very touched by his actions.he got his pay!too bad right.he don't have a girlfriend to splurge on.so needa spend on me, a very goodfren. and yeah.we became really goodfrens ever since jc for no particular reason.goodfren who could really share problems with each other and have hearttohearttalk but will never get together cos we each have someone we couldn't let go of.and yes. frens for life.
3)

met up with minjun on tues. super long since we really met up.probably for more than 2 years!surprisingly, we still have so much to talk about.she updated me on her TCM course and that she's heading to china for two years next august.

take a look at that. that's her notes for her TCM exam!holly mama.couldn't believe it when i saw it.seriously can put into exhibition. thats like just one of the many pages she had done for herself.am impressed.really shocked by the amount of effort she put in.
4) and yes,as usual, went to chinatown to experience the cny mood and atmosphere.





5)actually went to chinatown with jie on jan23 to participate in the lighting up of the cny deco. had fun and of course, did really stupid stuffs. wanted to shop for our cny clothes but we didn't manage to get anything after a long day outside.very demoralised but outing ended off in a good note in the sense that we saw the fire crakers and a little bit of the fireworks.

anyway, there were super lots of people around!cramming like shit literally.but i liked that.
6)met up with f6 for dinner to celebrate birthday. dined at spageddies, orchard central. an awesome place!though food was okay only,atmosphere was great!cos we literally owned the whole outdoor space since there are very few dinners.and yeap, had a great laugh and great chat with the girls.thankful for the meet up.

7)then it was this photo that everyone's talking about.

yes. jiji kumaleh jkj gathering proudly organised by me. was a very big gathering as there are alot of people involved.as usual, there were moments when things are really irritating and i was quite fed up. but still,in ended with a bang? hah.i hope. guessed evyone enjoyed themselve even though there wasn't really much activities planned.was just a dinner with everyone at fish n co. pictures and pictures. i remembered i was superhigh that day.forgotten why. probably cos it's been long since we had a decent gathering like this. would have been better if we had a round table as it was difficult for us to talk to everyone on a long rectangle table.still,enjoyed myself that night.regretted not taking more pictures though.afterall,my pictures with them are really outdated! so just one last picture to add on to the rest of the photos in facebook.

8)got a small pot of 风信子 at the market. do you know what's the meaning of 风信子?听说风信子的话语是说对不起。所以如果有对不起谁,可以送他风信子吧!

yes, it gonna look really great when it blooms fully. put this infront of gonggong's altar.yes. im sorry. still apologetic for not being able to see him for the last time. so if it really signifies one's apology,i hope gonggong can feel it.
9) "mr ngoh took away my sec 1 class. i don't know what to feel right now. i understand his intention. he wants me to concentrate on just one level and so preparation wise and everything else will be easier and more straight forward. he is really taking great care of me here. but i really liked my sec 1 class. cos they are really the most innocent and fun loving batch whom i have build some sort of rapport with after these few weeks. yes, i have more free time now, time table not so packed, probably wouldn't be so stressed up like now and etc etc etc. but.okay.i know.i shouldn't even ask. shouldn't even say "but" cos im not in any position to do so and yes,mr ngoh knows what's the best arrangement. okay.so what i needa do now is to really focus fully on my sec 2 classes now and give them all of my attention.it's week 6 now. 14 more weeks to go. im going to make miracles. make a real miracle where a relief teacher produces the best maths results across the cohort; bring it on."
that was
supposedly my entry for yesterday.so much for a glamorous teaching job.im like bloody screwed now.bloodily screwed up.i can't stand it anymore.i really can't stand teaching anymore.im so freakingly stressed out.having 2 sec 2 classes with me.and i really know nuts about teaching!i can't teach.i just can't teach. people say you must like that thing before you can do well in that thing.so, what now.what's with my screwed up teaching life now.im just a bloody rt!with no experience,no training,no nothing at all!and they actually trust me to take up sec2 classes.i know im asking for too much.im aleady well taken care off,and in great hand under ngoh.but i can't help it but feel so screwed now.i don't know who to go to at all when i felt so desperate.i felt freaking helpless at this moment in time.that i want to break down crying.and yes. i did. a few days ago, broke down, cried in the staffroom and don't even dare to go down for my lunch. it was a pathetic feeling to feel so helpless at certain moments in life,especially now,which was supposedly the best period of my life.i really hope this 14 weeks can pass by very quickly and i better prepare a bonsai of 风信子 for the next teacher who's going to pick up the rubbish and crap i leave behind by the time i leave. come on;i need strength.i really do.
10)为什么脆弱时候,想你更多.
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